Today has been a bad day that culminated in a horrible evening. My whiny two year old wouldn't stop crying. My two-month-old-four-month-old would wake up after a 30 minute nap and want to be held. This evening I yelled at Gibson when he yelled NO at me and hit me with his fist. I sat him in the corner where he and cried and cried and cried while I tried to feed a crying Tabitha. Finally I had enough. I set her in her crib (fortunately, she was happy at that point) and carried a sobbing Gibson up the stairs, changed him into his pajamas and put him on his bed. Then I told him that I couldn't handle him right now and I shut his door and went to my room and sobbed to the Lord.
I knew that part of Gibson's behavior was a reflection of my behavior. I really needed a nap today and wasn't able to take one because Tabitha was fussy. That just put me on edge for the evening. I opened up the Psalms and tried to find something to calm me down. I can't remember what I read, it was somewhere around Psalm 80, but I did get some calmness out of it.
Then I heard Gibson sobbing my name. That just melted my heart. I went in to him and picked him up and just hugged him as I rocked in the chair. I told him that I was sorry I yelled at him and I was sorry I got frustrated, and that I love him. He then told me that he was happy. I asked him why he was happy and he told me that he was happy because he had his mommy. I think at that point my heart pooled on the floor. (Then he told me we have an oven downstairs, a beautiful oven. I have no idea where that came from or what that meant.)
I sang him a song that I could barely choke out for the tears in my throat, and put him back into bed. I prayed with him and told him I love him and left the room again; only this time, it was with a joyful heart instead of a tearful one.
THANKFUL THURSDAY
17 hours ago
3 comments:
We've all had those days and you handled it very well. He probably meant the kitchen or maybe comparing your kitchen to Chef Biscette's kitchen and the good food you fix down there. Hopefully, you will have some warmer dry weather and he can play outside more. I'm sure that will help; cabin fever can get us all.
Grndpa Dick
The hardest thing to do is to admit to your children that you are wrong. But it has the best affect.
Gramdpa Dick
this almost made me cry Vinae, but in a good way. I have definitely had those days with Ava. I have had to ask her for forgiveness so that I can properly discipline her in a Godly way. I have been reading, "Shepherding a Child's Heart," and it has really helped me to check my heart and Ava's. This stage is definitely a trying one and it's so much harder when you have a baby too. Thankful we have God to kneel down to and ask for help. thanks for sharing this, you are so good at getting your feelings out and helping us other mom's out.
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